Subliminal Messages in Korea: Practice Safe Sex

Korean candy gifted to me from one of the students at my hagwon.

Hives in Korea: Hive Genocide

I have been reading a lot of Hive Testimonies, and have decided to try to kill the Hives before they kill me. 

My Plan of Action:

Attack the Hives from within by eating a controlled diet of fresh vegetables, breads and water. After weakening the adult male Hives, I will then send in a second wave of fresh fruits and exercise to ruthlessly slaughter the women and children Hives, thus preventing a new generation.

Food Journal:

January 29, 2011

Peanut butter (Skippy, Peanut Butter, Smucker's Goober Grape), Bananas, Berry Berry Jam, Bread, Water, Milk

January 30, 2011 Woke up with a sore throat 

bread, Peanut Butter, banana, water, Skippy, zucchini, mushrooms, cinnamon bread. Berry Berry Jam

January 31, 2011 Woke up with a sore throat 

Bread, Skippy, Berry Berry Jam, Water, Sunkist Candy, zucchini, mushrooms, egg, banana 

Going to bed with what I believe to be a cold

February 1, 2011 Woke up feeling great 

Bread, banana, egg, water, coffee, Sunkist Candy, Apple, Skippy, Berry Berry Jam, zucchini, mushrooms, tomatoes 

Going to bed with a sore nose from it running all day (get it? sore... from running?)

February 2, 2011 Woke up late and great 

Bread, Skippy, Egg, Water, apple, UH-O!!! Hite, Cass, German something, Jager, Pizza (with everything), pickles, nuts, salad

Thought I was itchy, but too drunk to say for sure

February 3, 2011 Woke up with a headache, no runny nose though 

Mushrooms, tomatoes, egg, water, orange juice, JAYUSIGAD candy bar, Coke, Skippy, bread

Feel good, no signs of the hives

February 4, 2011 I think my hives are almost completely gone 

JAYUSIGAD candy bar, coke, egg, German sausage, spicy onion salad, mustards,

February 5, 2011 

JAYUSIGAD candy bar, Korean Foods, more Korean foods

I think i'm OKAY.


Conclusion:

I believe all Hives to have been successfully annihilated. However, I have heard rumors of survivors. My body and I are constantly on the look-out for any trace or clue to their existence, but any evidence found thus far has been inconclusive. My eyes are peeled.

Pizza in Korea

Pizza in Korea is different, but the same. The prices for pizza in Korea tend to be higher than the United States, but since tipping is not practiced in Korea, if you order delivery, it can be close to the same. And, if you live in Korea, you know delivery bikers risk life and limb to get you your pizza quick. They fly through red light intersections. They drive on the wrong side of the road. They drive off-road, and they are constantly coming within inches of pedestrians. The choices of pizzas toppings, in Korea, seem endless with potato, sweet potato, prawns, corn and many more available. All pizza places serve pizzas with a side or two of pickles, Parmesan, and hot sauce. Some of the pizzas I purchased even came with a complementary soda.  The pizza places below are those of the Singa-Dong residential area in Gwangju, South Korea. 

PIZZA HUT or 피자헛 
Pizza Hut (home service) pizza in South Korea taste just like Pizza Hut pizza in America. The pizza shown is a regular supreme and cost ₩14,800. It cost ₩17,800 for delivery. 

Nanta 5000

Nanta 5000 has got to be the cheapest pizza in South Korea, but that only makes it better. Larges start at ₩5,000. They say it feeds 3-4 people... NOT TRUE. It feeds one person, but at ₩5,000 it is a great deal. I would compare it to Ci Ci's Pizza in the United States. The pizza shown is a large Combination Pizza.

Imsil Pizza 

High priced pizzas with great specials.  The pizza shown is a large Bulgogi Pizza for ₩9,800 (normally ₩16,800). It taste good, but expires fast. So, eat it before it gets cold. The crust is a little tough to chew. 

Dasarang

Dasarang is a nice sit down restaurant that also delivers. It sells american-style pizza and chicken, as well as, various Korean dishes. The pizza shown is a large "whatever I pointed to on the menu" for ₩18,000. I think 

a combination. I remembering it tasting awesome, but I had the drunchies. So, what doesn't taste awesome?

Pizza Club

Pizza Club was is my choice for best crust. The pizza shown is a large combination for ₩21,000. It was the most expensive pizza I purchased, but the crust was made of individual cheese filled bread rolls.

Hives in Korea

Urticaria, also known as HIVES, is an outbreak of swollen, pale red bumps or plaques (wheals) on the skin that appear suddenly -- either as a result of the body's adverse reaction to certain allergens, or for unknown reasons.

Friday, January 7, 2011, a co-worker showed me around the area after work. We talked, ate at the Lotteria, shopped and then I went home. Later that night, I am talking, on Skype, with a friend and realize I'm scratching my bicep and don't know why. I take off my shirt and see little red spots on the inside of both my arms. They itch. I think... no bugs, no plants, no friends with itching powder. Crap, what is this? After a quick search on WebMD, I self-diagnose it as HIVES.
Great... after all these years of sticking what ever I want into my body, it decides to get picky.  Having a "survival of the fittest" outlook on life, I tell my body, quite bluntly, "You're just going to have to get use to it... Adapt or die."  I'm not sure if he was listening, but for the benefit of us both, he should have been.
(Conversational between me and my body)

Saturday morning, I awake and they have multiplied. They are now down to my wrist and right below my armpit.
Saturday night, hesitant to close my eyes, for fear they may make babies while I'm dreaming, I go to sleep.
Sunday morning, they have spread like the undead in a zombie movie and are now down my sides, around my waist,  on my lower stomach, outer and inner thighs, outer butt, and hamstrings.
I decide I will not give my body the satisfaction of scratching it and use my Miyagi like since of inner peace to dissipate the itch.
Sunday night, after a long day of sightseeing, I return home. As I reach for my shirt bottom, my fingers gently grace the sides of my lower stomach. It feels good.  I pull my shirt over my head and feel invigorated as my shirt rubs against my arms.  Then, I get chills from the friction of my pants and skin rubbing together, as my pants are pulled down. This causes me to lose my inhibitions, and like Pringles, once I popped, I just couldn't stop. I scratched myself violently for almost 5 minutes.  It felt awesome, but the high was short lived. I look up at the mirror to see a naked white man, covered in red scratch marks.  Pitiful... I had become a victim to myself.  I shower and start anew.
Monday morning, even though the hives are still very much alive, they had decided to practice abstinence.
Monday afternoon, I speak with my coworker and boss about my reaction.  I tell them my plan to relieve the itch with allergy medicine and am offered the assistance of my coworker, by my boss.
Monday evening. Coworker and I go to the pharmacy to purchase allergy (al er ge) medicine.  The woman at the counter say take once a day and I begin a medicine regiment that night.
Tuesday. I am still a little itchy around waist and thighs, but forearms look better. I think.
Wednesday. I am still itchy but only when I'm not busy. Forearms look better... Maybe.
Saturday, Jan. 15th - After thinking my body was adjusting, today, after exploring Downtown Gwangju, my hives have inflamed around entire arms and probably more, but I am too afraid to look. I'm sooooww itchy.
Sunday, Jan. 16th - Realizing the allergy medicine is doing nothing to help, and may even be hindering my body's natural process, I leave the remaining 4 doses in the box.
Thursday January 20th - I still have a small expatriate community of hives on the inside of both arms and hip/waist area.  Until my body decides to deport them or their visas expire, we will have to learn to live together. We have already made much progress in the past 2 weeks and maybe, in the end, I will be a better, stronger me, for having met them.